Beyond The Comfort Zone: Six Months Of Fellowship Journey

Life as a fellow is often romanticized, normalized or even misunderstood. But in reality, it is a journey filled with constant challenges, emotions and personal growth. Living as a fellow means stepping into a world that is unfamiliar, uncomfortable, and at times, extremely difficult. It demands resilience, adaptability, and an openness to embrace the unknown.

Coming from West Bengal, a place I had never left before, my transition into this life was overwhelming. The idea of moving away from my home, family, and everything I had ever known was daunting. There were moments of excitement, but more often, there was a sense of fear and loneliness. The comfort of familiarity was replaced by an environment where I had to rebuild my routine, relationships, and understanding of the world from scratch.

Living in Madhya Pradesh has been an experience unlike any other. The culture here is vastly different from what I have always known. From the language to the customs, every aspect of life feels new. But instead of resisting the unfamiliar, I have chosen to embrace it. With time, I have started seeing Madhya Pradesh not just as a place of work, but as a home away from home.

A Reflection Of My Mother’s Struggles

One of the most profound aspects of my work here has been engaging with women. These women, like my mother, have fought silent battles their entire lives. They have faced systemic oppression, struggled for independence, and have often been denied the right to dream. My mother, too, was married at an early age, her aspirations taken away from her before she could even begin to chase them. Growing up, I saw her longing for a life she was never allowed to live. She wanted freedom, education, and opportunities.

Solace In Solitude

There are days when I miss home so much that it feels like a physical ache. But instead of letting loneliness consume me, I have learned to embrace it. I have found solace in solitude, using it as a space for self-reflection and growth. Being alone has allowed me to understand myself better, to listen to my own thoughts without external noise, and to develop a deep sense of self-reliance.

The fellowship journey has also meant constant movement—traveling to new cities almost every month, leaving behind places just as I start to find comfort in them. Every time I settle into a routine, build connections, and make a place feel like home, it is time to pack my bags and move again. This constant transition is overwhelming. The uncertainty, the lack of permanence, and the continuous process of adapting to new environments often feel exhausting.

But amidst this never-ending motion, I have discovered something invaluable: home is not just a place—it is the people you meet along the way.

Worthy Anonymity

I have found home in the warmth of strangers who became friends, in the shared meals with colleagues, and in the small conversations with locals who welcome me into their world. Amidst the women I work with, in their stories, in their laughter, and in the silent understanding we share. I have found home in the little moments—watching a sunset in a new city, sipping tea on a roadside stall, or simply sitting with someone who listens without judgment.

There are days when I roam around the city, exploring its streets, its people, and its stories. Each place has a unique rhythm, a distinct culture, and a different set of challenges. Meeting new faces, learning about their journeys, and exchanging perspectives has been one of the most enriching parts of this fellowship. Every conversation adds a new layer to my understanding of the world, making me realize how interconnected our struggles and dreams truly are.

Regrouping

One of the most special moments in this journey was attending the fellowship training after 6 months, where I finally met the faces I had been waiting to see. The excitement, the nervousness, and the overwhelming joy of resonating with 21 other fellows who are on the same journey as me was enormous. Sitting together, sharing our experiences, and realizing that we are not alone in our sojourn was a moment of comfort. It felt like a place where all problems could be solved because everyone here was fighting their own biases and challenges of a new ecosystem and the grassroots and still moving forward.

The life of a fellow is not just about professional growth; it is about personal transformation. It is about understanding privilege, unlearning biases, and stepping out of comfort zones every single day. Also, witnessing struggles firsthand, feeling the pain of others, and yet finding hope in the smallest of victories. It is about questioning one’s own identity, beliefs, and aspirations while trying to make a difference in the lives of others.

There are no shortcuts to this journey. It is filled with uncertainties, self-doubt, and an unending search for meaning. But at the end of the day, when I sit back and reflect, I realize that every struggle, every tear, and every challenge is shaping me into the person I am meant to become. And that, in itself, makes this journey worthwhile.

This experience is not just about work; it is about creating change—within myself and in the lives of others. It is about carrying forward the dreams my mother could never live and ensuring that the women I work with don’t have to fight the same battles alone. It is about embracing the loneliness, the challenges, and the growth, knowing that every step forward is a step toward a better version of myself and a world that values women’s dreams as much as men’s.